out of it

I slept A LOT this weekend. Before you pat me on the back and say, “Way to go!” you might want to hear the rest of the story. The good news is that I just prayed Psalm 51 and pleaded with God to create a pure heart in me, and show me lots of mercy. I’ve been a lousy excuse for all it is I am these past 2 days. (that sentence couldn’t possibly be grammatically correct)

Friday night was fun. Our new friends Derek and Brittany (and baby Lexi) came from out-of-town, and we went to Easton, so Gabe and Derek could stand in line at the Apple Store for free t-shirts. Brittany and I and our girls hung out at Pottery Barn Kids for over an hour. We sat and chatted while the girlies played with the kitchen sets and dollhouses. I hadn’t met Brittany until that night, and it was wonderful getting to know her.

Then we went to Midnight Madness (think trick-or-treat meets street fair or something) and met Kimberly! The girls got candy, we chatted and strolled and had all sorts of fun. (Then Kimberly got sick later that night, poor thing!)

I got up late Saturday, then fell asleep on the couch mid-morning, then took a 3-hour nap. In between all my sleeping sessions, I was moody and grumpy and in a deep fog. I yelled at the girls–a lot. We took them to Boo at the Zoo that night, then out to Chili’s. Nina threw a fit, and I took her outside while my food got boxed up. She screamed for Gabe for a good 20 minutes while we waited for the rest of our family to finish eating. Judge away, anyone who thinks that a good mother would have been able to prevent and/or solve this tantrum episode.

Can’t remember what happened the rest of the night. Oh, “finished” my book, but have lots and lots o’ tweaking to do in the next couple days. Worked on McGraw-Hill a bit. Yelled a lot. Went to bed at 2:00 because I wasn’t tired after all that sleeping.

Got up at 7:30 for church. Thought I might die from exhaustion. Had trouble during praise and worship because of my stinky attitude. Great sermon. Got over myself by the end of it.

Made plans to play with Livi and Ava during Nina’s nap. Couldn’t stay awake. Slept for over an hour. Got up, took the girls to the “wooden park,” then for a walk at a metropark–we saw 2 deer on our walk–one was a big ol’ buck. Fun, fun.

More lovely moments today than yesterday but my temper is as short as all get out. Once I make it through this week, the plan is to slooooow down. This should help.

Tomorrow (Monday)–hair appt with my cool stylist friend at 9:30. Jamie‘s coming to celebrate our birthdays at noon. Lots of revisions to do on the book. Lots of mgh stuff. Speaking at a Woman to Woman conference on Saturday on “finding joy in motherhood.” Oh, the irony. (Would you please pray that God would give me the words to speak to these women and fill me with His Spirit so I’m not walking in defeat this week?)

I believe that’s more than enough for now. Thanks so much for your great stories for the book!

Happy Monday to you, and to me a good night!

12 thoughts on “out of it

  1. SuperScuzzy

    She told you a secret, eh?  Hmmm I wonder what it could be…  I will post about it sometime in the not too distant future, but for now we’re just taking it easy and trying not to imagine the chaos that will ensue.  We’re both excited though and glad I’ll be done working soon!

  2. swbtsmom

    Several years ago, in a similar situation to yours,overtired and overwrought,  my quiet time scripture for one particular day was Hebrews 4, a somewhat confusing (to me) passage about the promised rest. As I tried to make sense of it, and not terribly sincerely trying, verse 9 absolutely jumped off of the page and climbed all over my spine before it reached my heart: “A Sabbath rest remains, therefore, for God’s people”. I know, it probably means nothing to you, but there was God’s promise to me – I needed rest, kept looking for it, working for it; He had a rest for me remaining – supernatural rest. I wept and wept, couldn’t put words to the comfort that the Lord brought to me that day, wrapped in an obscure verse in Hebrews.  I’m praying for you, Marla, a Sabbath rest that you can’t explain, straight from the Lord – whether or not your circumstances change this week.

    Oh, I really really understand that you don’t want to hear this, but trust me: these ARE the good old days for you. I’m also praying that the Lord will show you that sweetness in a way only you will understand this week. Thanks for encouraging so many young women – wish you’d been in my life about 25 years ago!

  3. jessyomama

    The statement, “Come to me, all who are weary and heavy burdened, and I will give you rest for your souls,” is true! So when I feel like saying to God, “No! This yoke is not easy and this burden is not light!” it’s always a good time for me to also ask, “Why?” Yes, the answer is always me. I’m carrying my own burden instead of carrying Christ’s burden. Isn’t it easy to start loading ourselves with burdens (tasks, jobs, etc) that are ours? Trade in the yoke, girl!!! Trade in the yoke!

  4. terriwright

    Anyone who would judge didn’t have real kids, they had Stepford kids. I asked the boys(35 and 32!) recently if I ever played with them, read to them…all I can remember is the frantic pace and frustrations of living. Both boys looked at me with utter ‘are you crazy?’ looks(that happens often anymore…) and began to recount things and times and books…….

    The business of living gets in the way of life sometimes. I love you, you’re a good Mom, stop beating yourself up for being disgustingly human! Your brain is fried, you know…..

  5. filledeparis

    Thanks for being transparent once again. Prayed for God to give you His words for the conference, and His grace for each moment this week. Way to go on finishing the book, Marlavous!

  6. Nixter77

    Good night lovely!! Sleep tight, have prayed for you and will continue to pray for you as you get through some busy times. Please make some time to rest and I think you should defo slow down afterwards.. Love ya!

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