Thank you for your kind words and prayers for my grandma today (here and on Facebook). I’d love to hear more memories you have of her if you know her personally.
I got to spend time with her again today. Gabe and the girls and I hung out in her room for about an hour or so, and we got lots of smiles, hand squeezes, and even a few words. Gabe got a couple winks. She’s always been a little flirty with him, and I love it.
Saying good-bye for the last time was so hard. I hated leaving her there while her hands were still warm and she still has breath in her lungs, and I could look into her eyes and have her see me. Lots of tears. And I feel a heavy blanket of grief on my shoulders tonight. I know how blessed I am to have had so much time with her, but it still hurts.
Some other things have transpired in the last day or two that kind of make me want to curl up in the fetal position and cry. Our list of unknowns just keeps getting bigger and bigger, and wow.
I’ve never wanted coffee more than today.
But all I’ve got is Jesus (and my sweet family).
And this season of life is really, really, really good practice for “my only true requirement being the sweet presence of Jesus.” My friend Ali sent me this link yesterday, and while I can’t relate to being held hostage and tortured for my faith, I can relate to feeling really close to Jesus in times of uncertainty and pain.
I speak to a small group (13) of high school girls Saturday night and Sunday morning and would love your prayers that God gives me the exact words they need to hear. And a sweet, humble, Jesus-shining spirit as I share.
And I would love to pray for you. Just leave a comment or e-mail me here.