i can't be all the things

If I had a dollar for every blog post I’ve started in my head (or catchy title I’ve scribbled on a scrap of paper and then lost) in the last month, my fam could eat at Chipotle every meal for a week.


So much I want to do and say and be and write. But I’m too all over the place to focus on a post that makes sense. And matters. I’m overwhelmed by it all and, while this is pretty standard fare for my particular brain, I kind of feel like I might explode. For reals.

And since writing is a huge outlet for me, I’m just going to air it all (most of it) out there instead of waiting until I have the energy for something great.

There are some things I want to do better, some things I’m doing pretty okay at, and some stuff I want to make more space for in my life.

And I don’t exactly know which things fit in which categories, so I’m going to rough-draft it here. Speaking of, Gabe and I have been sloooowly working on our Rule of Life for the year. At this rate, we should be done filling it in around August.

In no particular order, here are some things I’m doing pretty okay at and things I want to do better.

(Just so we’re clear, this isn’t about me trying to be superwoman–and feeling guilty when I’m not. This is me thinking out loud about how I want to spend my one life.)

Some Things I’m Doing Pretty Okay At:

  • being a mom. My girls like me, they want to be with me, and the pre-teen/teen years are so far so good.
  • being a wife. Gabe and I have our moments (oh my word), but right now we’re doing pretty sweet.
  • eating vegetables (except we’ve been “cheating” on “ethnic” foods which used to mean Ethiopian/Somali/Middle-Eastern/etc. and has come to include free asiago cheese bagels from Panera, because hello! panera means bread in some other language, right? Ethnic.)
  • reading books. I’m really really good at this one.
  • getting to know our new neighbors. We haven’t been here long, and it’s going really well.
  • making world map note cards with The Dancing Elephants.

Some Things I Want to Do Better:

  • blog more. And about stuff that matters.
  • write more e-books. I have 3 in the works (very early stages) and just can’t get motivated.
  • be a better daughter and sister. I don’t know what this looks like, but my family means the world to me, and I feel like I don’t let them know that very often.
  • get/stay organized. Holy cow. I can’t get it together these days for the life of me.
  • manage our money. We live paycheck to irregular paycheck, so budgeting is challenging. But I’m not really doing it AT ALL.
  • pray in more than fits and spurts. I want to reeeally take time to listen to God.
  • finish the books I start. Heck, finish all the things I start. I’m a really good starter.
  • be available to people.
  • advocate for the poor and oppressed here and around the globe.

And BONUS! My Wish/Prayer List:

  • continued healing for Gabe.
  • a return trip to Cambodia.
  • pay off our debt.
  • close on our house.
  • relationships with our neighbors that lead to them becoming our brothers and sisters in the faith.
  • spring.

Whew. This was totally not an exhaustive list, but it still felt good to get it out. Thanks for listening.

Anything you’re doing well at or want to do better?

2 thoughts on “i can't be all the things

  1. Rachelle

    I love that you’re working on your Rules of Life. I however cannot unravel myself enough to go there right now. Recently I was thinking about all the things I wish to do that I’ve laid down because LIFE. God seems to be bringing me to a place of revisiting a ministry opportunity that I had kind of forgotten. Sometimes I think experiences, time and perspective give us the gifts we need to pick something back up where before we didn’t have everything we needed to do that thing. I know that totally makes sense (-: God is so good!

  2. Sarah

    I loved this post. I should probably sit and process these things too. But, I have a question…why are we good at starting, but not so good at finishing? I can dream up a project, a book, a whatever – I can be soooo excited about it. I can plan it, begin it, and love it. BUT, I am often not a finisher. Hmmmm….How can be better at the finishing?

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