I haven’t forgotten what nights were like with a newborn. Nothing compares to those. Some of them were barely survivable.
Last night wasn’t as bad as all that, but for someone whose children should be sleeping peacefully for a good 10 hours each night without so much as a peep (ha!), it was horrific.
I went to bed at midnight. I laid out clothes for a little run in the morning. I haven’t run in almost a week.
Nina woke up at 1:00, moaning. Covered her up, scratched her back, crisis averted. Woke up a little later, same thing. This time all my loving and caressing didn’t work. I was back in my cozy bed with the window cracked open (mmm…) when I heard sniffling, then sobbing. She was standing at the gate in their doorway, shaking. Poor thing seemed scared to death.
At 3:50, she got in bed with us.
At 3:55, Livi’s crying. She had a bad dream. Something about people with guns. She “needs” to come sleep with us. Sorry, all full up, I tell her. She begins to sob. I pray with her, remind her that God does not give us a spirit of fear, that Satan is the one who wants us to be scared, and on and on. She wants me to stay with her the rest of the night. That would mean either crawling into her top bunk or standing beside her bed with my arms above my head scratching her back. Um, no.
She finally asks if she can sleep with Ava. I let her. Ava’s fast asleep, so she can’t protest. Livi puts her pillow by Ava’s feet.
I go back to bed where I have a bad dream. I was at Cedarville University (?). It looked nothing like I remember it, and I got lost. I parked my car in the middle of nowhere, walked barefoot (?) to an office and asked for help. I was there for a reason, but I can’t remember what it was. Some lady told me that I was in the wrong place, and I’d have to walk another mile to get where I needed to go. I did, crying all the way. Then I found out my car had been towed. Someone left me a note that said, “We’re tired of you parking here every day without paying for a permit. It’s over.” (?) I began sobbing.
In real life, I think Nina kicked me and woke me up. I was so sad. I had tears streaming down my face. My eyes still hurt this morning from crying.
I settle back to almost-sleep when I hear yelling from Livi and Ava’s direction. Ava has discovered Livi in her bed and is kicking her. Livi is kicking her back. Remember, they’re head to feet. I send Livi back up to her bed and walk out.
“I forgot my pillow in Ava’s bed!” I get it for her and walk out.
“I’m thirsty!” I take a deep breath and head downstairs to get Ava a drink of water.
“I said I’m thirsty!!”
“I’M GETTING YOU SOME WATER!!”
Back in bed. It’s 6:05. Alarm goes off at 6:30. I have stomach cramps (too much late-night snacking?) and decide not to run. Shocker. Up at 7 something.
And that’s all. And now it doesn’t really seem all that bad.
So, tell me. How was your night??