a new chapter

The fear-of-failure part of me is super-hesitant to write a blog post saying, “Hey! We’re leaving the last year-and-a-half in the dust and moving into something awesome God has for us! Turning the page, starting fresh, hyped-up and ready to rock-&-roll!! Let’s DO THIS THANG!!!”

Because what if it doesn’t really happen? What if there’s some residual anxiety and/or piling-up of bills or Gabe and I aren’t on the same page or we try something and it doesn’t work out, or God forbid, there’s another heart attack or something comparably awful? What if, what if, what if?

The HELL with what if.


God is so good. Just so, so good. And he’s BEEN good, even when things were so, so hard. And they aren’t exactly the easiest they’ve ever been even now, but oh sweet mercy, there are shining rays of hope and light ALL OVER THE PLACE.

First of all, the girls earned all the $ they needed to go to camp in July! I’m so proud of them for working so hard and selling stuff they didn’t need. And so thankful to everyone who hired them and/or bought their treasures (and some of mine too). They’re SO excited to go, and Nina has a whole itinerary of stuff planned for me and her while they’re away (and she’s paying!!).

Second of all, Gabe woke up a few days ago with an announcement. 100% completely out of the blue. “I’m going to get a job.” This is a whole ‘nother post, but holy wow. He had to quit his job last March due to his panic/anxiety, and while he’s been self-employed in the past, this time it has been just so hard. For months, he wasn’t even able to work much. Then the debt hole was so big, it was just so hard to climb out (and yada yada yada).

On the surface, this would seem to go against my big dream of traveling the world/being a missionary in Cambodia/living a life of global nomad-ness. HOWEVER. It doesn’t at all. More on that later.

And Gabe’s desire to get us out of debt and his initiative in deciding to get a job and his confidence that he’s healthy enough to do it?

The hugest answer to prayer in the universe.

And we had some talks this weekend that have me floating on whatever Cloud is just above nine. Holy cow. Trying to contain the giddy. Asking God to calm my heart and set my mind on the tasks in front of me.

And there are so many of them.

Everything just seems to be coming together and making sense, and it’s been a long, long time since I’ve felt this way. God is giving me lots of ideas for using what I’m good at (mostly writing and also purging) and leveraging them to get us to where he wants us (and where we want to be).


AND I found out about some secret icing on the proverbial cake. Seems my husband e-mailed an online friend of mine a few weeks (months?) ago and asked her to help arrange for us to meet. She lives all the way in TX but she’ll be speaking in Peoria, IL in August, and a few girlfriends and I are going to take a little road trip and squeeze her neck. So excited!!

And there you have it.

Anything exciting going on with you?

27 thoughts on “a new chapter

  1. Pingback: i’ll trade you | Marla Taviano

  2. Lisa Basner

    A new chapter….pretty much sums up things around here too. We moved into our new house last Monday (the 10th). We’re just .7 miles from my folks with sidewalks and no major intersections between here and there. We’ve downsized into an adorable little house with a nice, flat, good sized yard in a quiet neighborhood. God is good, even in the hard times, and I am so thankful for the way He has led us to this point and to this place.

    1. Marla Taviano

      So, so, so happy for you, Roomie!! We were at my parents’ today with my sisters and their fams, and we were looking at old photo albums. There was a pic of me and you (I think on the first day we met), and I told my sis, “We love each other so much more now than we did back then.” :) xoxoxoxoxo!!

  3. Betsy

    I feel like I’ve been holding my breath for you and this post since the heart attack. I don’t even know you. But I am so very happy and love hearing of the faithfulness of God. Thanking Him for this, and so so happy for you.

  4. Rachelle

    So happy for you!! Happening here: beautiful business with my kids, opportunities to tell mama’s with young ones that every stage of parenting is the best and a road trip with a friend to She Speaks in July! Ha-that one was not on my radar. Going where he leads!!

  5. Elizabeth

    I LOVE reading about your excitement and enthusiasm-it inspires me. Your faithfulness over the last year and a half has been such an example to me.

    Camp will be awesome!

    Love you dearly.

  6. Shannon

    What a blessing and an encouragement to read this! You’ve been so open and vulnerable about hard stuff, and that makes me want to be a braver story teller, too. Thank you for sharing your life with us here. And how cool that your girls have what they need for camp (God is so faithful) and that Gabe is feeling stronger -trusting God has perfect plans and will keep on showing them to your family. And trusting that your God-created dreams are safe as always, in His hand.

  7. sheri

    awesome….. what a feeling eh! I mean that place where we have stepped on the other bank of a journey through. May God open the window of heaven over you ….and as He opens that window may the air of His presence fill your lungs.. to breath easy. Love your families!!

  8. Danielle

    Marla friend, I am so happy that you are having a cooling-off-after-being-in-the-fire-for-so-long time. God is faithful to let us enter into his rest in tangible ways sometimes!

    I am so thankful for slow but steady healing. Tomorrow will be a month since the tumor was removed, and every day I feel a little stronger, more stable, and more hopeful for the future God has given me to have in him. We are dreaming of a lot of things we thought were never going to happen because I was so sick and didn’t know if I would ever be better. He is faithful, abounding in steadfast love, and his plans are good even when they are hard.

  9. Jen Lehr

    Tears of joy….I don’t leave comments often, but I’ve been praying for you guys. I’ve also battled anxiety like Gabe has had. This is just such great news. I’m excited to see what God does in this new chapter for your family!

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