I can’t get Mistake Number Nine out of my head, so the NaNoWriMo post I had planned (where I brag about FINISHING A 50,000-WORD NOVEL IN A MONTH) will have to wait.

So, we know that bloggers who hope to get a lot of traffic need to develop a brand, a primary message, something consistent that readers keep coming back for. If Random is a brand, then I’m all over it. (Bless all of you dear hearts who commented yesterday that you just love my rambling and “Don’t ever, ever stop!”)

Here’s the quandary (man, I love that word): I have a job. That job is to write and sell books. The writing part? I’ve got it down. (did I mention that I just chonked out a 50,000 word novel in 29 days?)

Here’s how I used to picture an author’s job: Write book. Get book published. Sit back and watch book sell. Repeat. As it turns out, yeah. I was missing a huge slice of the Successful Author Pie.

Here’s what publishers are looking for: a person who can write (me! pick me! I can write!) AND has an enormous following of people who will all buy that person’s book once it hits the shelves (bummer). In other words, you need more than great writing to convince a publisher to take a chance on you. You need semi-celebrity status and/or a history of stellar book sales. I have neither (my sales have been “modest” or “mediocre,” depending on who you ask).

Ideally? I would blog to make friends. As an author? I’m supposed to amass fans. I’ll tell you what. Making connections and building genuine friendships is infinitely more rewarding than knowing a lot of people read my blog. Sure, it’s fun to be popular. But I’d rather be liked (and yes, there’s a difference).

Fans are fickle. Friends are loyal. Fans inflate your head. Friends inflate your heart. You can have thousands of fans and still be very lonely. Friends are there for you when you’re hurt or frustrated or need prayer (or a hug).

I would love to just be Marla The Person (Friend, Sister, Mentor) here on the blog. But Marla The Author is a big part of who I am too. I wish numbers didn’t have to matter. But in my line of work, they do. (The obvious solution? Each of you promise to buy 100 copies of my next book.) I guess what I don’t want to be is the Girl Who Pretends to be Your Friend So She Can Sell You Something. I want to be the Girl Who Wants to be Your Friend. Period.

I know God is in control of my career and all that entails. I also know that it’s my responsibility to use my gifts wisely and not let them go to waste. I don’t know, unfortunately, quite how all of that is supposed to look in my daily life and blog.

Do you have any brilliant ideas, friends? (500 words! Again! Kapow!)

Now, before my loyal friends (and mother) all rush to my defense, let me just say I agree with him. And no, Michael Hyatt didn’t actually call me a lousy blogger to my face (or otherwise). (And no, I’m not going to mention Monsieur Hyatt in every post from here to forevermore.)

Here’s the deal. Mr. H. wrote a post on Saturday entitled, “Do You Make These 10 Mistakes When You Blog?” Sadly, I’m guilty of roughly eight of them on a regular basis. Boo. And I’m re-posting his Mistakes List without permission, which is most likely Mistake #11, but I’ll write now and ask forgiveness tomorrow. Here’s Mr. Hyatt’s list (in bold type) followed by my comments.

Mistake #1: You don’t post enough. Well, bless my soul. I got this one right. I post just about every single weekday and sometimes on weekends. Score.

Mistake #2: You post too much. Well.

Mistake #3: Your post is too long. Yes. Guilty. Apparently, the goal is 500 words per post. I’ve already written 181, and I’m just getting started.

Mistake #4: You don’t invite engagement. The posts that invite the most engagement are those that are “controversial, transparent and open-ended.” I agree. And yet, I shy away from the controversial many times because I’m often still licking my wounds from the last time I dipped my toes in the pool of controversy.

Mistake #5: You don’t participate in the conversation. Mr. Hyatt does an amazing job of replying to the comments on his blog (right in the comments section). I do talk back but not a lot.

Mistake #6: You don’t make your content accessible. In other words, do you write in such a way that people can scan your content and items of interest will catch their attention? (subheads, bulleted lists, shorter paragraphs.) On rare occasions, I’ll nail this one. Like today.

Mistake #7: You don’t create catchy headlines. Not with any frequency.

Mistake #8: Your first paragraph is weak. Most days? Guilty.

Mistake #9: Your post is off-brand. What does this mean in plain English? Well, bloggers who are trying to build traffic (get more blog readers) are supposed to stick to a primary message. “Hobby bloggers” can get away with a little more random, but they’re not going to get tons of people coming back (except for friends and family). Herein lies my biggest quandary. (stay tuned later this week for an entire post devoted to Mistake Number Nine)

Mistake #10: Your post is about YOU. Gulp. Mr. Hyatt asserts that readers of this blog don’t care about Marla Taviano; they care about themselves. “What’s in this post for ME?” you ask. This one’s a biggie. Even if you’re someone who comes here because you know and love me, it’d still be nice to get something out of the blog, eh?

Please keep in mind that he’s talking specifically to bloggers who want to increase traffic to their site for one reason or another.

Which of these mistakes do you think is most important to avoid?

500 words on the nose! Rock on!

If you missed Part 1–self-publishing: profitable or pointless? check it out here.

And on a completely unrelated (but super important) note: Happy 33rd Birthday to my husband Gabe (aka GodsMac)! I love you!

Okay, now that we’ve got the mush out of the way, how about we jump back in to the self-publishing debate? Watch it. Sure, I’m ready to jump. Whatcha got for me today?

First things first, did you know Michael Hyatt retweeted your blog post yesterday? Oh, did he? I hadn’t noticed. That’s nice.

Oh, brother. So, let’s talk about agents. Do wanna-be writers really need one? I mean, they take 15% of your hard-earned profits. If you self-publish, you can bypass them altogether. Sounds good to me. Okay, again, much has already been written on the topic. Agent Rachelle, Writer Jody, and Publishing CEO Michael (and tons of others) have all written really good posts about this, so I’m just going to share my personal experience.

Long story short, I got my first two book deals without an agent (read my unorthodox story here). Hooked up with an agent for my next two. And signed on with The Most Fabulous Agent in the History of the World a couple months ago (and lest you think this is flattery, I’ve already wooed her and won, so there). Here’s what TMFAITHOTW (aka Rachelle) does for me: She takes what I’ve written and reads it through her Super Agent Filter. She knows immediately if my project stands a chance. She suggests ideas for improving my writing. She says things like, “This is too boring” or “This won’t work” or “Maybe try this…” She knows publishers. She knows the market. She knows good writing. And she doesn’t hand out empty compliments.

When I think of what my project WAS and what it IS NOW (and is still becoming) because of Rachelle’s wisdom and advice, I could weep.

Okay, okay, okay. But you just said you got your first two book deals without an agent. So…? Let’s do this book by book. Book #1–honestly, I handed the completed manuscript in to my editor, and he said it was amazingly clean and he made very, very little changes. Book #2–same deal, except for one thing. My editor (a different one) suggested that I needed to “soften my approach.” I was trying to get women to (make) love (to) their husbands, but I was being a little bit of a bully about it in places. Book #3–again, as is. Book #4–My agent made a couple minor changes in my proposal. Then my editor suggested some amazing ideas (I hadn’t written the book yet when I submitted the proposal) and the book turned into something fabulous.

Still not seeing the point of an agent… That was then. This is now. I’m ready to step things up to the next level. Publishing houses are going under. The ones who are thriving (or at least surviving) are cutting the number of books they publish each year. It’s harder than ever to get a book deal. And so on and so forth (and such as and such as).

Which brings me to another point…

Hey, I’m the one making the points here. Whose blog is this anyway? Anyway, Rachelle encourages me to do my absolute best. Honestly, most of the time I’m tempted to just write “good enough.” Like this blog for example. I’ll go back and proofread, but I don’t spend a lot of time revising and rewriting (hardly any time actually) and it shows. But a blog post doesn’t necessarily have to be your absolute best writing. A book should be.

I think most writing can be improved and improved and improved some more. Sure, eventually you have to call it a night and send the thing to the printer, but I think many times, we’re just too lazy/impatient to keep polishing our stuff until it shines. We want immediate gratification–seeing our name on a book before we put in the months (and probably years) of hard work. And as one commenter said yesterday, if you publish mediocre work, you’ve damaged your reputation. People won’t want to read your work again, even if it’s good.

So, you’re saying that everyone who chooses to self-publish is a lazy gun-jumper? I love how you put words in my fingers. N-O. That is not what I’m saying. I already talked about how I self-published a book (and I may do another one someday). And I mentioned my friend Tammy. And there’s also my friend Cheryl. Some things I want to write may never be picked up by a traditional publisher, but that doesn’t mean I don’ t know a lot of people who would be interested in reading them.

I think you’ve got to examine your motives. Do you have something to share that may benefit people now instead of waiting 10 years until it’s perfect and you find an agent to represent you? Or are you just impatient? If you’re a believer, it’s something to pray about faithfully until you feel God leading you in one direction or another.

This book publishing thing is not for the faint of heart.

Well, I could stay here all day, but this post is twice as long as a Thanksgiving Eve post should be. And it is your husband’s birthday, and you’ve barely mentioned him. He’s the one who suggested I write this post. He’s a little more networked and savvy than I’ll ever be.

Happy Thanksgiving from both of us! Me and Gabe? Or me and you?

I am you, you moron. Just ignore that man behind the curtain.

If you’re one of those writer (or aspiring writer) types, chances are you read this gal‘s blog or maybe this guy‘s. We live in a day and age when people who dream of writing a book can get a leg up on the competition just by being informed–and those two blogs are a great place to start cramming your head with helpful information.

Um, Marla, what in the world are you even talking about? Ah, yes. I’m getting ahead of myself. To fill you in (and if you’re one of my sweet readers who has no interest in writing or publishing, come back tomorrow for some fun pictures!), a couple publishers (Thomas Nelson and Harlequin) have recently announced new self-publishing divisions. Basically, if you have a story to tell and want to write a book but can’t find a way to get it into an agent’s (or publisher’s) hands, here’s your chance! (if you have a few thousand dollars lying around not earmarked for say, your house payment)

Have a little parentheses fetish, do we? Uh…

Based on everything already written about this, it would seem you’ve entered the conversation late. So why bother writing a post now? Ha! Can you read my mind? I’ve started this post several times in my head and each time concluded, “Why bother? It’s all been said already.” (Catch up on the conversations here and here.) But then I realized something. I don’t have to shed new light. I don’t need to solve any problems or offer conclusive answers. I don’t even have to take sides.

I just need to tell it like I see it. Bear witness to my own personal experience.

When (if ever) is self-publishing a good idea? In 1997, I spent 3 months on the island of Okinawa, Japan as a student teacher. That experience made a huge impact on me, and the writer/storyteller in me needed to get it on paper. Now, no one but my relatives and supportive friends (and the kids I taught in Japan) is going to care to read a book about an obscure college student’s teaching adventures. So, I self-published it with this company. It cost me a whopping $99 back in 2001. The best $99 I’ve ever spent. (their packages start at $599 now)

I love that those three months of my life are documented, bound and printed in this book. I never promoted it, have no idea how many copies it sold, but it was worth every penny and every minute I spent writing it. If you have a story to tell and want to preserve it for generations to come, self-publishing could be for you.

Well, good for you doing it 8 years ago for pocket change. Let’s say I spend $6000 to get my book self-published. How easy will it be to earn that money back and then some? Next to impossible. Well, that’s not true. If your book is fiction, then yes, it will be impossible. Unless you wrote The Shack. And non-fiction? You’ve got to figure out a way to get tons and tons of people to buy your book. It can be done, but marketing also costs money which just adds to your bill.

Do self-published books count as “real” books? In a word, no. When people ask me how many books I’ve written, I say four. That would be the three published by Harvest House and the one published by Howard Books. I don’t even count my self-published book in the total.

Are there exceptions to this “not a real book” thing? Heavens, yes. My amazing friend Tammy self-published two books that have probably sold more copies than all four of mine combined. She’s a brilliant writer and speaker, has met an incredible felt need, and she and her books are destined for greatness.

I have a great story to tell. What are my chances of getting a “real” publisher interested in my book? Um, not that great. And your chances (and mine) are getting slimmer every day, it would seem.But that doesn’t mean…

Hey, hate to cut you off before you even get to the good stuff, but this post is already a little long. Any chance you could continue your brilliant thoughts tomorrow? Uh, sure. But I kind of promised my faithful readers some pictures…

They seem to be a patient group. Back tomorrow with part 2 of “Self-Publishing: Profitable or Pointless?” Maybe you could talk about agents and stuff. Yeah, what he (she?) said. And in the meantime, if you want to read more, check out these interesting posts from my friends Peter and Jody.

Last day of Writer’s Week! And since I’m too lazy to link to the other five posts again, just scroll on down if you missed any of them!

What do you do in the event that you’d like to be a Mom and a Writer–at the same time? (and I realize you’re 50 other things too–just focusing on these 2 today) Is this okay? Can you do both well, or is one going to suffer? Are you a better mom if you wait until your kids are older to pursue your dreams?

Gail and Jody both brought up really good points in their comments this week. Gail referenced an interview she did with author Deborah Raney where Deborah says that each family is different, “but my ‘stock’ advice to ‘aspiring writers who have small children at home is: WAIT. At the very least, wait until they’re all in school (or school age, if you home school). They’ll grow up before you know it, and then you’ll have all the time in the world to pursue your writing dream. …”

Jody says, “Balancing writing and family responsibilities is incredibly challenging! But at the recent conference I attended, the key note speaker said that through our writing we can inspire our children to follow their dreams. I’m beginning to accept that my writing will make my family life less than perfect, but it wasn’t perfect before either! And in fact, perhaps my writing can enrich my family life in a new way!”

This is one of those issues when I think you HAVE to spend time in prayer and ask God what is best for YOUR family. And you CAN’T give into peer pressure or let yourself feel false guilt over your choice or JUDGE other moms who choose a different path than you.

My mom and I chose similar career paths. We both taught school for awhile, then left teaching for good when we started having babies. Then I veered off the path when I started freelance writing for McGraw-Hill when Livi was a baby. Then I moved on to writing books and speaking.

So, who made the best choice? We both did.

My favorite chapter in this book is Chapter 10–Changing the World. I talk about how I didn’t know this until recently, but my mom always dreamed of having some type of ministry with my dad. As it turned out, she served (in many ways) at church and blessed people left and right, but her main ministry was taking care of her hubby and four kids.

But those four kids? They became a youth pastor’s wife, another youth pastor’s wife, a youth pastor, and an author/speaker. Without Mom’s full-time dedication to her family, who knows what career paths they would have chosen? Mom made a huge sacrifice to give up her dream so her children could spend their adult lives serving the Lord. And looking back, she wouldn’t have it any other way. (p. 198)

Then there are those of us who choose a different path (or it chooses us). Join me in the middle of p. 193…

Yes, our dreams get put on hold sometimes. No, God never promises to grant us our every fantasy.

And no, your dreams can’t be all about you. Especially if you’re a wife and mom. Leaving your family members to fend for themselves whild you go find yourself and pursue your life calling is not an option.

But on the other hand, I think we tend to underestimate God. Many times we just suck it up and unselfishly put our dreams and passions aside because we think that’s best for the kingdom.

Have we considered the possibility that God just might let us have our cake and eat it too? That maybe He has a place for us right inside His kingdom that has room for us to be wives and moms while doing something we’re passionate about? Something we can do that will matter for eternity?

Our dreams don’t have to be all about us, but they don’t have to be exclusively about our kids either. I actually think our kids are better off if we have dreams and passions outside of them. They feel less pressure when they see that Mommy and Daddy (and the rest of the world) don’t orbit around them. And a child respects a mother who uses her talents in some way or pursues a dream outside of motherhood.

So, tell me: which way do you feel God leading you? Putting your dreams on hold for now? Pursuing them in tandem with motherhood? A happy medium? Are you feeling overwhelmed and conflicted at the moment? I’d love to know how this plays out in your daily life.

One more thing–I’ll be talking about this more in a later post, but just wanted to let you know I’ve joined NaNoWriMo. In a word, I’ve committed to writing a 50,000-word novel (from scratch!) in the month of November. Along with thousands of other crazy people.

I would LOVE it if you jumped in and joined us.

This is way out of my comfort zone, but writing fiction is a someday dream of mine that I’m going to go ahead and get started on (28 days from now).

Have an awesome weekend, friends! Remember–next week is YOU Week!