I tried to write a post last night, but the exhaustion won over. This morning I feel refreshed and ready to face the pool. And the dentist (Ava). And the eye doctor (me). Okay, not really, just trying to psych myself up.

There is much going on, and I’m trying to get used to this new normal. Having all three girls home, Gabe at work, owning a pool pass, trying to get our Cambodia ducks in a row, and blah, blah, blah. By the time I get in the swing of things, I’m sure summer will be over.

Oh well.

The Cambodia support-raising is going well. We are just stinkin’ blessed to know so many stinkin’ generous people. Man alive.

And I have an exciting offer today. You know those Restaurant Super-Saver Coupon Books? Well, my aunt Lisa gave us EVERY PENNY from the 5 we sold. And then gave us some more! So, I have 5 to sell today, and 1 can be yours for a $15 donation toward our trip.

We keep all the $, and your coupon book almost pays for itself when you buy a Domino’s Pizza and get one free. You can also get free Big Macs and Long John Silver’s Sampler Platters and Arby’s Roast Beef sandwiches and AUNTIE ANNE’S PRETZELS (be still my heart) and Big Buford Burgers and Hungry Howie’s Pizzas and on and on and on.

The first 5 people to tell me they want a coupon book get one.

And one more thing. You know the Worlds Apart Project? Where I wrote that book (it’s a download that you can read on your computer or print out) and I’m selling it to make money for missions? Today only, the book is just $1. Just click here and donate $1, and I’ll e-mail you the link to the book.

Now, if you don’t want coupons (fabulous coupons!) or an e-book, I still want to hear from you, because an entire summer is too long to go without connecting with my computer friends. And here’s something I read this morning that really stuck with me.

In all our thinking about Christian service, prayer needs to become fundamental instead of supplemental… Prayer is the work; it is the essence of the task to which we are called, and apart from it, all other work, and I mean Christian work, is a sheer waste of time and energy divorced from the basic work of prayer. Everything else is insignificant. (Scottish theologian Eric Alexander)

A good word for me during this busy time. How about you? Can I pray for you? Leave a comment or e-mail me privately.

So, for the Listers:

1. Comment if you want a coupon book for $15.

2. Click to donate $1 if you want to read Worlds Apart.

3. Let me know how I can pray for you.

4. Give me a quick update on your life.

I appreciate you, friends! Have a great Tuesday!

“Yeah. Why?”

“Because all week long, God kept saying, ‘Marla. Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla!’ I was so glad to see your eyes today! You’re sure everything’s okay?”

“Uh… I’m pretty sure.”

And then I went home and thought of a whole bunch of things that are wrong with my life. And I’m totally blaming her.

No, seriously, there’s nothing worth complaining about in my world. So maybe I’m in a bit of a funk. So maybe I’m a little confused and uncertain about what I’m doing/where I’m going/what’s supposed to happen next. So maybe I’ve been grouchy lately (seriously–ask Gabe) for no good reason.

Our Life Group meeting tonight helped put all that blather into perspective. We had an amazing time with Jen, who’s back in the States on a quick 2-week break from her life/work in Cambodia. We each shared a little bit about what’s going on in our lives (it’s been a few weeks since we’ve gotten together).

Then Jen shared more about her work in Cambodia and what God is up to over there. Crazy awesome stuff in a dark and oppressive place. She stressed over and over and over again how much she and her teammates desire to be covered, buried, slathered in prayer.

Then we took turns praying for her, and man, you could feel God’s presence like He was sitting on your lap. I so want to be faithful in praying for her (and her teammates, and her pastor and his family, and the little girls being trafficked, and the men who keep these child brothels in business…).

And I desperately want to be 100% sure (like Jen is) that I’m smack dab in the middle of God’s will for my life (even if what I’m doing is super hard).

And I really, really, really have a burning desire to take a trip to Cambodia.

And I’m applying for my passport tomorrow.

And we’ll see what God has in store.

I really, really, really want to seek Him first in my life.

What’s on your heart right now? How can I pray for you today? Your request doesn’t have to be as heavy as sex trafficking. God wants us to bring all our burdens to Him, big or small.

I did not have the best day.

It started out GREAT, if not early. My mama called at 2:30 am to tell me that this little beauty had arrived (my newest niece, Mia Noelle). I am so in love with her already and praying that I’ll get to meet her while she still has that adorable newborn look, smell, feel and cry. (Please, Lord, please!)

So, that was 2:30. It all went downhill from there.

Nothing that happened was my fault. That’s the good news. The trouble is, while I can’t choose my circumstances, I CAN choose my reaction. And I chose the WRONG reaction. Over and over and (sickeningly) over again.

I won’t share all the sordid details, but I very nearly did NOT survive one of the worst nights EVER with one of our children. It was so horrible. Again, it started out as all her and her issues. Then I must have decided it would take too much effort to handle her in a patient, godly, calm manner, and I exploded. She’s forgiven me, God has forgiven me, but man. I feel like I’ve been emotionally shredded.

Thank you to those of you who prayed, because things drastically improved (then got bad one more time). Now everyone is in bed and hopefully very near sleep. New mercies in the morning–praise the Lord!

Got my world rocked just a bit this afternoon. The retreat I thought I was speaking at on February 12th is actually on February 5. YES, THE DAY AFTER FEBRUARY 4TH. Thank goodness the miscommunication wasn’t my fault, and I’m still available to go. But I’m not at all prepared and praying for the biggest epidural God has on hand.

Add in a couple disappointments, a couple frustrations, and this, that and the other thing, and I just want to quit.

Quit what, you ask? Oh, I don’t know. Just quit.

I was actually thankful tonight for a sinkful of dishes so I could take a breath and ask God to please calm my heart in the midst of what (to me) feels like a lot of trials.

But then I spent 90% of the time bemoaning my pitiful existence.

Spare me.

I think I’m on the upswing, but I would love your prayers. I know it’s the only chance I’ve got to survive this weekend. And motherhood. And life.

And maybe you could share something HAPPY from your day. That would make me smile.

Love you guys!

Please continue to share. I have plenty o’ room in my prayer journal, and it really takes no time at all to pray over your needs. Seriously. And if you have something really personal, feel free to e-mail me (a couple sweet gals already have).

Thanks for asking how you can pray for me. I’m actually not really sure, so I’ll just give you a peek into my heart right now, and if you want to pray for me, you can do it however you’d like.

I’ve always been a moody gal–high highs, low lows, and quite often in the same day (or half hour). The last few months I’ve started to wonder if I might suffer from depression. But then that oppressive, heavy feeling lifts and I feel okay again. Actually, honestly, the past couple days have been wonderful. After feeling discouraged and hopeless, I feel full of hope. Hmmm…

Hope is a word that has come up many, many, many times in the past little while in my life. I’m thinking of informally choosing it as my Theme for 2010. The theme for my life, my blog, my other writing. Anyway.

I think I’m hem-hawing around stating any actual prayer requests, because I don’t want to say, “Pray that God gives us more money, some book success, and a healthy family in 2010.” I love, love, love what Beth Moore prays for herself and her family–”Deliver us from everything but your glory, Lord.” And I’d love for you to pray that for us as well.

I’ve been really bad lately about letting our money situation get us down. Using our Christmas money to pay “insufficient funds fees,” calls from creditors, Gabe deciding every other day that the only responsible course of action is to leave ministry work and get a “real” job, borrowing money from my 3-year-old to put gas in the van.

But you know what? The times our financial situation is at its most dire? Those are the times that God swoops down, scoops us up, and SHOWS US HIS GLORY. And oftentimes, shows others as well.

So, you know what you can pray for me, for us? That God will deliver us from everything but His glory. If money troubles bring Him glory, bring ‘em on!

And that we will put our hope not in temporal things like financial security and book deals and positive feedback from others, but that we’ll put it in CHRIST. In his death, resurrection and the promise of spending eternity with Him on the most unfathomably incredible New Earth. That all of creation–us included–will be whole, perfect, redeemed, Shalom personified.

May I never lose sight of that hope.

Love you guys! Happy New Year!

If nothing else, I’ll pray He draws each of us closer to Himself as we finish this year and begin the next. Love you guys!

How’s my birthday going, you ask? So far, so crappy. No, really. I’m working on an optimistic attitude, looking for all the happy. Looking, looking…

I went to bed at 7:20 last night. And got up at 10:30. That is a TON of sleep. And sleep? Not generally my activity of choice when my mother-in-law has graciously offered to keep our children for 2 whole days (!).

Anyway, I missed a Delightful Costume Party I’d been looking forward to for a month. And I don’t know that I’ll be going anywhere fun today (I guess I didn’t mention what my deal is–I have some sort of sinus infection where my head and ears feel like they’re going to explode).

HOWEVER, I have something fun I’d like to do right here from the comfort of my desk chair.

I’d like to give some unborn babies the gift of a BIRTH-day this year.

I’ve mentioned several times that I would love to give away thousands of copies of my book Expecting to mamas-to-be who weren’t planning on having a baby. Mamas who are young and/or scared and/or poor and/or unmarried. Mamas who know that the easiest thing to do (maybe the only feasible thing to do) would be to have an abortion.

My hope and prayer is that a pregnant girl would see the drawings of a baby in the womb, read the descriptions and prayers, and that God would whisper to her heart, “There’s a real baby in your belly. A person. A sweet, innocent little life that I created. Please give him the chance to grow up.”

Two moms of teenage boys approached me this week. Both of their sons’ girlfriends are pregnant. I sent Expecting to one, and I’m getting ready to send it to the other. The one girl already read the entire thing (in one day) and wants to come to church with her boyfriend’s family this week.

I can’t tell you how this thrills my soul. I want so badly for God to use my writing to touch hearts, change lives, bring people to Him. I love it when He lets me witness it happening.

So, here’s the deal: in lieu of a birthday gift (because I’m sure just about all of you were contemplating getting me one), would you donate an Expecting book to a scared, hurting mama-to-be here in my hometown Columbus, Ohio? (I’m going to give them to the Pregnancy Decision Health Center to give to the women who come asking for help.)

The books cost me a little over $8 apiece, but if you just donate $5, I’ll donate a book. (and put your first name on the From line if you’d like)

And then I’d ask just one thing more. Would you commit to praying for the woman who will receive your book? I dream of saving hundreds of babies from abortion, but then the reality hits me. How are these mamas going to take care of their babies after they’re born? And how are we going to help?

It’s one thing to be against abortion. It’s another to offer a viable alternative.

I don’t have the answers, so I’m just going to start here.

If you’d like to donate an Expecting book to a pregnant woman in need, click here and donate $5. I’ll write your first name where it says From (unless you specify not to). Your gift will mean that a little baby might have a chance to be born. Have a birthday. I can’t think of a better present on my birthday.

And then don’t forget to pray for the woman who gets your book.

On November 3rd, I’ll let everyone know how many books we donated–and I’ll include a little thank-you list of the donors’ first names.

If you don’t want to do Paypal, e-mail me and I’ll give you my mailing address and you can just send a check.

I don’t think I’ll be able to get tax-deductible receipts for this, but the tax savings on five bucks probably isn’t much anyway, right?

Thanks, friends! This is turning out to be a very Happy Birthday after all!

God, will you love on some of my friends today, right where they are? Some of them are having struggles with their kiddos. Some are itty-bitty babies (some still in the oven!) and some are all grown up. Give them peace and wisdom. Show them that you’re in control and love those kids even more than their moms do. Help them to trust in You one moment at a time.

God, be with my friends who are lost and confused right now. Those dealing with sadness and depression. Those who have longings that aren’t being fulfilled. Those who desperately desire something that you don’t seem to be willing to give them. Help them to lean on you. Show them how much you love them. Show them that your plan for them is better than what they can imagine. It may not be traditional or “normal” or the way everyone else seems to think life should play out. But it’s something amazing designed just for them. Help them to rest in that today.

Lord, help my friends who have pressing health issues. Whether back pain or sinus infections or pregnancy troubles or unmentionable problems. Show them that you are a God who heals. Alleviate some (or all!) of their pain today. Give them some relief. Help them see the good that comes through pain. Show them how you’re growing them through this time. Assure them that they can do all things through Christ who gives them strength.

God, be with my friends who are tired. Overwhelmed, burnt out, over-committed. Those who seem to have the weight of the world on their shoulders. Those who have to balance kids and family, a job or other work, a home, and lots of time-and-energy-consuming responsibilities. Give them some super-natural strength today. Bring someone along to help them. Show them where they can cut corners without anyone suffering. Give them a few moments of real rest today.

Lord, be with my friends who are questioning their faith today. Those who aren’t sure what they believe. Those who believe in you but just have questions. And those who don’t even know if they believe you’re real. Show yourself to them in a very, very real way today. Make yourself known. Let your glory shine in an unmistakable way.

Father, be with my friends who are struggling in their marriages. Those with minor problems that just won’t go away. Those with huge problems threatening to end their marriages. God, will you speak to some husbands’ hearts today and show them how they need to change? Will you give my friends strength to keep going in their marriages and taking the high road even when it’s harder than anything they’ve ever done? Will you show them where they could make some changes, where their own hearts are hard or bitter? Will you bring healing and forgiveness and work some miracles?

God, be with my friends who are parenting alone right now. Either the little ones’ dad is out of the picture completely or his work is taking him away for long, long periods of time. Show them that you have a special place in your heart for them. Remind them that it won’t always be this way. Love them hard today, Lord.

Please comfort those who are hurting, provide for those who are struggling financially, encourage those who need some love today.

Thank you that you love us more than anything.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

(originally posted September 8, 2008)