Okay, let’s toss aside the false humility and self-deprecation for a second and shoot straight. God has gifted me in several areas. I know this. And the ones that immediately come to mind are things that come easily to me–writing, speaking, offering words of encouragement to people…

HOWEVER. There is one thing (well, one I’m going to focus on) that I am NOT good at. And actually, to say that I’m not good at it is a complete cop-out. Because the truth is: I choose not to be good at it. Because it’s hard for me. And I’m selfish.

What is it, you ask? Tell us! Tell us!

Well, if you had an ounce of sense (did I mention I have the gift of encouragement?), the title would’ve given it away. What am I not good at?

Being there.

As in, just sitting with someone and being there. Having no agenda, being in no hurry, not getting up to check something on my computer. Just being there.

I want to get better at this. Not just so I can feel better about myself. Not so I can check another good deed off my list. But because being there requires selflessness, and I want my life to be characterized much, much more by that than it is at the moment.

Because being there requires trust. Trust that God will help me take care of all those terribly pressing, incredibly urgent tasks that won’t get tended to if I’m just sitting there being there.

Today my friend Val came over for a few hours. Val is the dear girl you’ve been praying for, the one who has eight little babies waiting for her in heaven. Val didn’t need me to say one more time, “I’m praying for you.” She didn’t need an e-mail or a facebook message or an encouraging tweet. She needed someone to be there.

And I’m thankful God chose me to be the one to be there for her today. Because even though I haven’t had a chance to ask Val if the day was a blessing to her, I know it was a blessing to me.

And God also gave me an opportunity to be there for my friend Kim. She brought lunch and hung out with Val and me for a bit, then left Kara, her 4-year-old, with us while she went to Children’s Hospital to be there for Billy and Amy while 3-week-old Gregory had an MRI done. Kim has been through this many much times with Miss Kara, so she could offer words of encouragement to a very anxious Mommy and Daddy who have already lost one baby and couldn’t bear to think of losing another.

Here’s gorgeous Gregory (oh, I could just eat him!), and PRAISE THE LORD! The bump on his back was just a calcified bruise that will take care of itself. Not cancer, not a tumor, not anything serious AT ALL. PRAISE YOU, JESUS!

All that to say–I want to be there for people. People matter to me because they matter to Jesus. And I want them to know it, to believe it (especially if their love language is quality time). Yes, I realize that I’m a wife and a mom and an author and a speaker with lots of friends and tons of connections, so there are honestly times when I can’t be there for people. But if it’s selfishness holding me back? Or a lack of trust? Then I want to be done with those excuses.

I want to be there.

Here are some things I read this week that I’ve just gotta share.

First and FOREMOST is this post by my friend Molly (whom I have only ever met inside my computer but plan to meet in person some day). Our lucky husbands (mine, hers) have gotten to hang out in real life. ANYWAY. This post made me C-R-Y and I was praising Jesus all day long. Wow. No, DOUBLE wow.

If you’re married, you HAVE to read this post of Missy’s. It’s called “The Marriage Bed” and I would love, love, love to include it in future editions of Is That All He Thinks About? if that were possible. Missy is now a real-life friend since we met in Houston in January. You might want to subscribe to this girl’s blog because you never know when she’s going to write something snorting hilarious.

Check out what my online-turned-real-life friend, Joanne, did to her 11-year-old daughter Audrey’s hair. I LOVE IT. And here’s her list of reasons why. (I’m totally letting Ava do this when she turns 11.)

And then there’s this post from my real-life friend Jen in Cambodia, who has just about convinced me to pray for some people I REALLY don’t want to pray for.

Have an awesome weekend!! Any fun plans?

Raise your hand if you’ve ever connected with someone online and then arranged to meet them in real life. (And I’m mostly thinking of fellow female bloggers here, not internet dating.)

I’m not sure what it is, but I’m so intrigued by stories of people becoming friends online and then meeting face-to-face. I know some of you are thinking, “NO THANK YOU. That would totally freak me out!” But really, you should give it a shot. I’m a living testimony that a solid 70-80% of my online friends were nice and safe when I met them in person.

Oh, I jest.

When we tell people that we stayed with 31 families during our Zoo Adventure and 17 of them were people we’d never met until we showed up at their house, we get a lot of lowered jaws and raised eyebrows. Even Gabe’s brother, Tug, who is a total people person, The Class Clown on Steroids, thinks we’re NUTSO for doing what we did.

But I think it’s awesome. I could go on and on and on (and actually already have) about all the FABULOUS people we’ve met in person after meeting online, but I don’t want to leave anyone out, so I’m not even going to start. All I know is that every single one of those meetings (online AND in real life) had God’s fingerprints all over them. ALL OVER THEM.

I’d love to hear about a friend you met in your computer and then got to hug her neck in real life. And if you have a link to a post you wrote about your experience, do share! And if you’re someone I met here first and in real-life later, pipe up, sweet friend!

p.s. Stay tuned tomorrow for one last chance to get Diapers books at a discount!

My brain has been on overdrive this weekend. I can’t stop thinking about how we crave community and how God has blessed us with this really cool thing called the internet and how even though there’s an unhealthy, unbalanced way to use technology and it should never completely replace face-to-face interaction, isn’t it just amazing to think about??

We can “meet” people through our computer screens and share our lives with them and pray for each other and shower sweet words of encouragement all over each other at random times during the day and so on and on and on and on.

I told you my brain was on overdrive.

I’ve been scribbling furiously in an 8-cent blue notebook with one of my beloved purple pens for much of the past 30 hours. It’s hard to say whether or not anything will come of all this brain-churning-turned-pen-scrawling. Sometime God lights a fire like this under me and it means “book.” Sometimes it turns into something like this. Sometimes He’s just helping me internalize some kind of truth about Himself. Whatever it is, whatever it means, I can’t stop thinking about it.

Today I’d like to hear from you. Just a quick sentence or two (or 14) about how God has used some form of online interaction to bless you recently. It can be something really big. Or itty-bitty. (But please don’t make it about an interaction you had with me. I already know about that. I want to hear something new!)

Then take a second to think about the fact that that particular blessing never could’ve happened 10-15 years ago. Isn’t that complete craziness??

Thanking God today for my online friends! You’re such a blessing in my life!

p.s. Come back tomorrow with a story about a computer friend you got to meet face-to-face! Speaking of computer friends whose doorsteps I’ve shown up on, HAPPY 38th BIRTHDAY to my dear friend Joanne!

p.p.s. And a quick shout-out to my hubby who just spent a kabillion hours designing this sweet new site for our author friend Kary Oberbrunner. Check our Your Secret Name!

And in case you forgot the question, tell me how God has used an online interaction with someone to bless you recently.

Happy First Birthday, Abigail! Your mommy and daddy (and so many other people) miss you very, very much, but they wouldn’t take a single day away from this amazing year you’ve spent with Jesus. We’ll see you soon, okay?

And I know you’re just tickled pink over your tiny, new baby brother, Gregory John (born March 1, 2010). He’s darling and gorgeous and will bring your mommy and daddy so much joy, but he will never, ever take your place in their hearts. It’s that magic that God does when parents have more kiddos–their hearts just grow and grow. And your mommy and daddy’s hearts are bursting with love for you, beautiful girl.

We love you, sweet thing. Happy, happy, happy birthday!!

If you haven’t seen this amazing video of Amy and Billy talking about Abigail, you’ve just got to. Seriously.

The following was originally posted on September 22, 2009. It’s long, but soooo worth the read.

I have a little friend who lives in heaven. Her name is Abigail. We only met once (March 6, 2009), but we became instant friends. And actually, by the time her daddy introduced us, the real Abigail was already with Jesus. I only got to meet her beautiful, tiny little body. Here’s part of her story (condensed from March 11 blog post–read the whole story here):

And I told you about my friend Amy’s baby Abigail, diagnosed with triploidy at her 20-week ultrasound in November. Abigail stopped developing at 16 weeks and wasn’t expected to live past 30 weeks. She made it 36. Her heart stopped beating 2 weeks ago, and Amy went in for an induction Thurs. evening…

Praise the Lord–Tammy [our pastor's wife] got to be there for Amy and Billy when they met Abigail. (Kim and I waited in the waiting room.)

Then Amy sent Tammy to come get us. We hugged her and Billy, then Billy wanted us to meet Abigail. I don’t know that I’ve ever had a greater honor in all my life. In fact, I know I haven’t.

She was beautiful. Kim held her. I cried tears of joy as I pictured her up in heaven, skipping with Jesus.

Her mommy and daddy have been through so much these past four months. Many people have expressed their disapproval that Amy and Billy chose to carry her, knowing her “fate.” They honored God so deeply with their choice, and I just know He’s using them and little Abigail for His glory. Mike and Tammy prayed and read Scripture over Abigail after she was born, and the doctor, nurse and midwife joined their circle. Talk about a powerful witness.

God is good.

Please pray for Amy and Billy. Oh, how hard it’s got to be for them right now. My heart breaks for them, leaving the hospital with empty arms.

Abigail’s sweet little face is permanently etched on the wall of my mind, reminding me that life is short and people are precious–especially my children. May I never, ever forget.

The past six months haven’t been easy for Amy and Billy. While the rest of the world has gone on with their lives, Amy and Billy still ache for their baby girl. And for much of the time, they hurt all alone. No one else understands the deep, deep love they have for their precious daughter.

But God is good. Still. And He has done so many beautiful things–in Amy and Billy’s lives and in so many others. So many incredible things. And Amy, whom I count as one of my dearest friends, told me just the other day, “If it hadn’t been for Abigail, who knows if we ever would’ve developed such a beautiful friendship? She brought us together.” She did, and I’m forever grateful to her.

And darling Abigail is rejoicing with Jesus today–and has been every day for quite awhile now, because growing peacefully in her Mama’s belly is her 16-week-old brother or sister. Due to enter this world on March 4, 2010–just 2 days before Abigail’s 1st birthday.

Can you believe our God?

Abigail’s condition was not genetic, and after today’s ultrasound, her little sibling appears to be absolutely and completely healthy, with Amy’s body doing everything exactly perfectly.

I know Billy and Amy are thrilled that God is blessing them with another baby. I even know that aside from some twinges of anxiety, they have an unexplainable peace about this baby’s health.

Yet, there’s one thing that’s a little tougher to work through. When Billy first found out Amy was pregnant, he immediately said, through tears, “I just don’t want Abigail to get gypped.”

For those of you with two children, you remember what it felt like right before your second one came. “How in the world am I going to love another child just as much? And how is it fair that I’m bringing another baby into this world and cheating my firstborn of some of my love?”

It’s magic though, isn’t it? You love them both. 100%.

Amy and Billy will too. It’s just that Abigail’s not here to physically receive her 100%. And some people don’t understand the depth of love a Mommy and Daddy can have for a child they spent such a short time with. They might think of this baby as taking Abigail’s place. No one can ever take the place of a child you’ve lost. Not even another child.

I’m having trouble thinking of words here to convey what’s in my heart. I guess what I want to say is this: will you pray with me for Amy and Billy? Will you pray for a healthy pregnancy for Amy (and strength–she teaches first grade) and for God to just lavish His amazing love and peace all over both of them? Will you pray for them as they navigate through the exciting emotions of expecting a baby while grieving another one? Each beautiful, happy moment is one they will feel blessed to experience–but without their Abigail.

And would you do me a favor and leave a comment for Amy and Billy letting them know you love them and will be praying? They mean the world to me, and I know your love and prayers will mean the world to them.

Congratulations, Miss Abigail, on your new little baby! We’re going to take such good care of him/her for you! Thank our Jesus for me, will you? I love you, girl!