Anyway. My favorite kind of t-shirt is one that means something, that supports some kind of cause (I’m hankering to do a post one of these days showing off all my tees.). And as of today, I have a new favorite:

My friend Megan and her husband Pete have two beautiful children and feel God leading them to adopt (domestically–North Carolina specifically). They’re raising money to cover the adoption expenses, and a friend designed these beautiful t-shirts to help their cause.

And may I tell you everything I love about them? Because there is MUCH to love!

1. This shade of gray is my FAVE.

2. I LOVE blue and green.

3. I LOVE trees.

4. I think “blessed by adoption” is just the coolest phrase to put on a t-shirt, because who hasn’t been blessed by adoption in some way? I have cousins who are adopted and friends who are adopted and friends who have adopted (or are hoping to). And I’ve been adopted into God’s family.

5. The shirts are only $12. I know!

Here’s the first take of my t-shirt modeling.

Poor Gabe. So, his camera’s broken, and he’s been doing all his 1photoperday.com stuff on his iPhone. He uploaded this pic to Flickr from his phone and didn’t notice I looked drunk. I told him I’d use it anyway, but he insisted on taking another one (the one above where my eyes are still half-closed but only because I’m staring into the setting sun).

So, hop on over to Megan’s site and get yourself (and your friends) a t-shirt. They come in kids’ sizes too!

And here’s how Ava chose to spend her Day #1 of her Multiple Birthday Celebrations (she turns 8 on Sunday). Her friend Madison spent the day at the pool with us, then we made homemade pizzas and went to Dave & Buster’s with FREE and BOGO coupons. Madison won FIVE stuffed animals in the claw game. Fun times!

Have a great weekend, friends! And if you have a minute, I’d love to hear how you’ve been blessed by adoption.

p.s. I have 5 more Restaurant Super-Saver Books for $15 a pop (all proceeds go toward our Cambodia trip). First come, first served! Let me know if you’d like one!

A couple weeks ago (back when I had grand dreams of going for a jog every day), I was pushing Nina in the jogging stroller around the block while the other two rode their bikes. We passed an older lady walking a dog (a large brown and black dog, maybe a boxer, but I’m not sure), and I said hi. Honestly, I kind of expected a brief acknowledgment at best. Our neighborhood is a melting pot of nationalities and personalities. Some people are friendly, others keep to themselves. I love it, but it’s no Oklahoma or Alabama.

So imagine my surprise when this dear woman says, “Well, hi there, sweetie. How are you today?” I told her I was just fine thank you and continued my snail’s pace jog with a grin on my face. We were going in opposite directions around the block, so I passed her again, and she was just as outgoing and friendly the second time.

A couple days later, it was just Nina and me jogging around the block. We saw her coming toward us again, and I said to Nina, “Look, there’s our friend and her dog.” I said hi and she repeated her familiar greeting, “Hi there, sweetie. How are you today?”

As she passed, Nina asked me what her dog’s name was, and whether it was a boy or a girl, and I told her we’d ask the woman the next time around. (We guessed boy.) Sure enough, there she came, and this time I stopped. “Nina would like to know your dog’s name.”

“His name is Rohan,” she said. I told her he was a very nice-looking dog, and she said that he was very sick and had lost 40 pounds. I told her I was so sorry and asked what was wrong. She said he had a condition called Megaesophagus where the esophagus is enlarged, and he can’t swallow food. So everything he had eaten in the past 2 months just came right back up. “I ordered him a special chair though,” she told me. “It’s like a high chair but without the tray. Hopefully if he can eat sitting up, he’ll be able to keep food down. He’s starving to death.”

I told her we would pray for Rohan, and she was so appreciative. I asked her what her name was and she said Connie. Then she told me how I run circles around her, and she doesn’t know what I’m trying to accomplish, because I look great. I should’ve pulled up my shirt and shown her the problem, but I didn’t.

We saw Connie and Rohan again when we passed by their house. We waved and said hi and then prayed for Rohan. I went home and looked up megaesophagus and Nina and I watched a video of a dog using the special chair. We prayed for Rohan again.

We prayed for him again at bedtime. I forgot, but Nina remembered.

Then I didn’t run for awhile. Then when I did, I didn’t see Connie and Rohan. Today, Nina and I went for a jog. After four laps of pushing the stroller, I was toast, so Nina rode her bike while I walked/ran. We had just passed Connie’s house when I heard her garage door go up, so we went back.

“Hi, Connie. How’s Rohan?” I asked.

“Oh,” she said, with such a sad face, “we had to put him to sleep last Wednesday.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry.”

“Thank you,” she said. And she told me how he just wouldn’t have any of the chair. He was just too weak to stand up. Last Tuesday she took him home (he actually belongs to her son and his family 40 minutes away, but she’d been taking care of him for 2 months, because it was really a full-time job). Her son took his 11-year-old son out of school, and he and Rohan snuggled together under blankets all day and played video games. The next day, they put him to sleep and ended his suffering.

She said she was getting teary-eyed telling me about it, and I asked her if I could hug her, even though I was sweaty and smelled nasty. She gave me the sweetest hug. Then she told me a story.

Her son was mowing his grass the day after they lost Rohan, and out of nowhere, a bird flew in front of him and landed right beside the mower. The mower that was running. Her son kept mowing, and the bird just hopped along and followed him the whole entire time, for almost an hour. Then when he was done, the bird flew over to the deck and perched on the exact spot where Rohan used to lay and dangle his paws over the edge.

“Wow,” I said. “That’s amazing. I’ll bet God sent that bird to comfort your son.”

“I think he did,” she said. “It’s almost like it was Rohan’s spirit.” I wouldn’t doubt it.

And I think God sent Connie and Rohan so that I could make someone feel valuable. And when Connie tells me that I’m a fast runner and don’t look like I need to get in shape, I feel valuable too (even if I know deep down inside that it’s not true).

On the outside, Connie and I are very different. She’s older; I’m younger. She’s shorter; I’m taller. She’s blacker; I’m whiter. She has a beautiful yard; I kill plants (not on purpose!). But I like her so very much, and I’m so glad we’ve met. Thanks to Rohan.

We’ll miss you, buddy. Thank you for giving me a new friend.

The smaller (but the one I feel the most) of the two is that if it’s going to get rejected, I can save myself a lot of pain by not telling you what it’s all about first.

The bigger reason is that the person guiding me through the process asks that I not divulge details until things are a bit more concrete.

Vague much?

I can tell you this. The project is involving a lot of research on my part. But not the kind of research where you go to the library and use the card catalog on the computer and find books about dolphins or giraffes. No, it’s the kind of research where you look back through old journals and e-mails and blog posts and comments on those posts and comments you left on other people’s posts and whew! It’s wiping me out.

But I’m having a ball.

And the words are flowing.

And I am h-a-p-p-y about that.

So. Some of you have the power, THE POWER, to save me minutes (maybe even HOURS!) of thinking and sleuthing by answering one or more questions for me. If any of these apply to you, and you have a free minute (or six) today, would you help me out? Pretty pretty pretty please??

Here we go:

These first 2 are for my oldest blog friends who were at Xanga Fest 2007 and/or 2008 (was that when they were??):

1. What feelings were going through your mind when you got there/while you were there?

2. What is one conversation you remember having, and who was it with?

This one is for people I met online and then in real life:

3. When/how did we meet online and when did we meet for reals?

And this one is a free-for-all:

4. In your experience, what kind of thing has instantly bonded you with an online friend? (i.e., a shared parenting struggle, a tragedy, a similar belief system, her sense of humor, common interests, etc) And give an example.

Oh, thank you, friends. You complete me.

Have a terrific, if not tantalizing, Tuesday!

p.s. I have plans to write some posts here in the next few months that will merit a click of the “Like” button. (see below) In the meantime, if there’s a post in the past that you liked and want to share, feel free to go Like it (is it just me, or did that sound like a veiled insult?).

God worked out every single detail last April, and while we loved every bit of our Zoo Adventure, there was just something crazy-special about the Texas (and Oklahoma!) Trip.

Seeing all my Texas friends‘ bluebonnet pics this week is killing me. Crazy, since I hadn’t really even known or cared about them before this:

Here’s a pic from each zoo we hit on that 11-Day Trip of Sweetness:

The Tulsa Zoo w/Elizabeth and Marina:

The Oklahoma City Zoo w/Megan and Jenn:

The Fort Worth Zoo w/Amy:

The Dallas Zoo and then on to Kaye‘s:

The Caldwell Zoo in Tyler, then on to meet Amanda and Kelli:

The Houston Zoo w/Kelli, then on to meet Mary:

Sea World San Antonio w/Kimberly:

The Alamo (what, not a zoo?) and staying w/Jim, Sandi (who actually had to fly to CA hours before we arrived!), and all their pups:

The San Antonio Zoo w/Emily and then on to meet Mel:

And last, but not least, the Memphis Zoo with Rachel:

This is what happens when you’re 3 years old and your parents drag you to 9 zoos in 11 days.

Click on the name of each zoo (like you don’t have Easter eggs to dye and Good Friday services to prepare for) to see more pics of that particular zoo.

And if you’re extra bored:

1. If you’re from Oklahoma or Texas, give your state a shout-out.

2. If you’ve ever visited one or both of those states, tell me when and why.

I got to see Kelli, Amanda and Mel again in January (so awesome), but it’s been a year since I’ve seen the rest of you!! Sniff, sniff. Love you all, my special Okie/Texas friends!

Maybe the only person you have any real contact with on most days is your 17-month-old who neither communicates with you clearly nor appreciates you appropriately.

Maybe you dream of having this amazing ministry that reaches thousands of people but don’t have the slightest idea where you’d even start. Or if anyone would even care.

Maybe you have a blog but only six people read it.

Maybe you think you’re dispensable, replaceable, unnecessary, invisible.

Last weekend at the women’s retreat I attended, a sweet gal (whom I know personally but don’t see often) handed me a note. Here’s what it said:

Marla–so many times we are used by God and we don’t realize… I want you to know He has blessed me through you this weekend. I came into this gym a very broken spirit last night, and you were a light! A warm smile, a knowing God was here… through you! Then again this morning. I am so grateful to know you and call you friend. Thank you for being the beautiful spirit that God has grown you to be. Love ya!

Notice she didn’t mention any of my books. Or my blog. Or any speaking things. Or the spelling bee I won in 6th grade.

So, what in the world did I do that was so impactful??

I smiled. I hugged her. I asked her how she was doing. And I genuinely wanted to know.

Can you do that? Can you smile at someone? Hug them? Ask how they’re doing?

Of course you can. And while most people won’t think to take the time to thank you in written form, you have no idea how far-reaching your gesture of love might ultimately be.

When you’re tempted to feel like you’re too insignificant to make a difference, just reach out to one person. Be there.

It will make all the difference in the world.

HOWEVER. There is one thing (well, one I’m going to focus on) that I am NOT good at. And actually, to say that I’m not good at it is a complete cop-out. Because the truth is: I choose not to be good at it. Because it’s hard for me. And I’m selfish.

What is it, you ask? Tell us! Tell us!

Well, if you had an ounce of sense (did I mention I have the gift of encouragement?), the title would’ve given it away. What am I not good at?

Being there.

As in, just sitting with someone and being there. Having no agenda, being in no hurry, not getting up to check something on my computer. Just being there.

I want to get better at this. Not just so I can feel better about myself. Not so I can check another good deed off my list. But because being there requires selflessness, and I want my life to be characterized much, much more by that than it is at the moment.

Because being there requires trust. Trust that God will help me take care of all those terribly pressing, incredibly urgent tasks that won’t get tended to if I’m just sitting there being there.

Today my friend Val came over for a few hours. Val is the dear girl you’ve been praying for, the one who has eight little babies waiting for her in heaven. Val didn’t need me to say one more time, “I’m praying for you.” She didn’t need an e-mail or a facebook message or an encouraging tweet. She needed someone to be there.

And I’m thankful God chose me to be the one to be there for her today. Because even though I haven’t had a chance to ask Val if the day was a blessing to her, I know it was a blessing to me.

And God also gave me an opportunity to be there for my friend Kim. She brought lunch and hung out with Val and me for a bit, then left Kara, her 4-year-old, with us while she went to Children’s Hospital to be there for Billy and Amy while 3-week-old Gregory had an MRI done. Kim has been through this many much times with Miss Kara, so she could offer words of encouragement to a very anxious Mommy and Daddy who have already lost one baby and couldn’t bear to think of losing another.

Here’s gorgeous Gregory (oh, I could just eat him!), and PRAISE THE LORD! The bump on his back was just a calcified bruise that will take care of itself. Not cancer, not a tumor, not anything serious AT ALL. PRAISE YOU, JESUS!

All that to say–I want to be there for people. People matter to me because they matter to Jesus. And I want them to know it, to believe it (especially if their love language is quality time). Yes, I realize that I’m a wife and a mom and an author and a speaker with lots of friends and tons of connections, so there are honestly times when I can’t be there for people. But if it’s selfishness holding me back? Or a lack of trust? Then I want to be done with those excuses.

I want to be there.

First and FOREMOST is this post by my friend Molly (whom I have only ever met inside my computer but plan to meet in person some day). Our lucky husbands (mine, hers) have gotten to hang out in real life. ANYWAY. This post made me C-R-Y and I was praising Jesus all day long. Wow. No, DOUBLE wow.

If you’re married, you HAVE to read this post of Missy’s. It’s called “The Marriage Bed” and I would love, love, love to include it in future editions of Is That All He Thinks About? if that were possible. Missy is now a real-life friend since we met in Houston in January. You might want to subscribe to this girl’s blog because you never know when she’s going to write something snorting hilarious.

Check out what my online-turned-real-life friend, Joanne, did to her 11-year-old daughter Audrey’s hair. I LOVE IT. And here’s her list of reasons why. (I’m totally letting Ava do this when she turns 11.)

And then there’s this post from my real-life friend Jen in Cambodia, who has just about convinced me to pray for some people I REALLY don’t want to pray for.

Have an awesome weekend!! Any fun plans?

I’m not sure what it is, but I’m so intrigued by stories of people becoming friends online and then meeting face-to-face. I know some of you are thinking, “NO THANK YOU. That would totally freak me out!” But really, you should give it a shot. I’m a living testimony that a solid 70-80% of my online friends were nice and safe when I met them in person.

Oh, I jest.

When we tell people that we stayed with 31 families during our Zoo Adventure and 17 of them were people we’d never met until we showed up at their house, we get a lot of lowered jaws and raised eyebrows. Even Gabe’s brother, Tug, who is a total people person, The Class Clown on Steroids, thinks we’re NUTSO for doing what we did.

But I think it’s awesome. I could go on and on and on (and actually already have) about all the FABULOUS people we’ve met in person after meeting online, but I don’t want to leave anyone out, so I’m not even going to start. All I know is that every single one of those meetings (online AND in real life) had God’s fingerprints all over them. ALL OVER THEM.

I’d love to hear about a friend you met in your computer and then got to hug her neck in real life. And if you have a link to a post you wrote about your experience, do share! And if you’re someone I met here first and in real-life later, pipe up, sweet friend!

p.s. Stay tuned tomorrow for one last chance to get Diapers books at a discount!

We can “meet” people through our computer screens and share our lives with them and pray for each other and shower sweet words of encouragement all over each other at random times during the day and so on and on and on and on.

I told you my brain was on overdrive.

I’ve been scribbling furiously in an 8-cent blue notebook with one of my beloved purple pens for much of the past 30 hours. It’s hard to say whether or not anything will come of all this brain-churning-turned-pen-scrawling. Sometime God lights a fire like this under me and it means “book.” Sometimes it turns into something like this. Sometimes He’s just helping me internalize some kind of truth about Himself. Whatever it is, whatever it means, I can’t stop thinking about it.

Today I’d like to hear from you. Just a quick sentence or two (or 14) about how God has used some form of online interaction to bless you recently. It can be something really big. Or itty-bitty. (But please don’t make it about an interaction you had with me. I already know about that. I want to hear something new!)

Then take a second to think about the fact that that particular blessing never could’ve happened 10-15 years ago. Isn’t that complete craziness??

Thanking God today for my online friends! You’re such a blessing in my life!

p.s. Come back tomorrow with a story about a computer friend you got to meet face-to-face! Speaking of computer friends whose doorsteps I’ve shown up on, HAPPY 38th BIRTHDAY to my dear friend Joanne!

p.p.s. And a quick shout-out to my hubby who just spent a kabillion hours designing this sweet new site for our author friend Kary Oberbrunner. Check our Your Secret Name!

And in case you forgot the question, tell me how God has used an online interaction with someone to bless you recently.

And I know you’re just tickled pink over your tiny, new baby brother, Gregory John (born March 1, 2010). He’s darling and gorgeous and will bring your mommy and daddy so much joy, but he will never, ever take your place in their hearts. It’s that magic that God does when parents have more kiddos–their hearts just grow and grow. And your mommy and daddy’s hearts are bursting with love for you, beautiful girl.

We love you, sweet thing. Happy, happy, happy birthday!!

If you haven’t seen this amazing video of Amy and Billy talking about Abigail, you’ve just got to. Seriously.

The following was originally posted on September 22, 2009. It’s long, but soooo worth the read.

I have a little friend who lives in heaven. Her name is Abigail. We only met once (March 6, 2009), but we became instant friends. And actually, by the time her daddy introduced us, the real Abigail was already with Jesus. I only got to meet her beautiful, tiny little body. Here’s part of her story (condensed from March 11 blog post–read the whole story here):

And I told you about my friend Amy’s baby Abigail, diagnosed with triploidy at her 20-week ultrasound in November. Abigail stopped developing at 16 weeks and wasn’t expected to live past 30 weeks. She made it 36. Her heart stopped beating 2 weeks ago, and Amy went in for an induction Thurs. evening…

Praise the Lord–Tammy [our pastor's wife] got to be there for Amy and Billy when they met Abigail. (Kim and I waited in the waiting room.)

Then Amy sent Tammy to come get us. We hugged her and Billy, then Billy wanted us to meet Abigail. I don’t know that I’ve ever had a greater honor in all my life. In fact, I know I haven’t.

She was beautiful. Kim held her. I cried tears of joy as I pictured her up in heaven, skipping with Jesus.

Her mommy and daddy have been through so much these past four months. Many people have expressed their disapproval that Amy and Billy chose to carry her, knowing her “fate.” They honored God so deeply with their choice, and I just know He’s using them and little Abigail for His glory. Mike and Tammy prayed and read Scripture over Abigail after she was born, and the doctor, nurse and midwife joined their circle. Talk about a powerful witness.

God is good.

Please pray for Amy and Billy. Oh, how hard it’s got to be for them right now. My heart breaks for them, leaving the hospital with empty arms.

Abigail’s sweet little face is permanently etched on the wall of my mind, reminding me that life is short and people are precious–especially my children. May I never, ever forget.

The past six months haven’t been easy for Amy and Billy. While the rest of the world has gone on with their lives, Amy and Billy still ache for their baby girl. And for much of the time, they hurt all alone. No one else understands the deep, deep love they have for their precious daughter.

But God is good. Still. And He has done so many beautiful things–in Amy and Billy’s lives and in so many others. So many incredible things. And Amy, whom I count as one of my dearest friends, told me just the other day, “If it hadn’t been for Abigail, who knows if we ever would’ve developed such a beautiful friendship? She brought us together.” She did, and I’m forever grateful to her.

And darling Abigail is rejoicing with Jesus today–and has been every day for quite awhile now, because growing peacefully in her Mama’s belly is her 16-week-old brother or sister. Due to enter this world on March 4, 2010–just 2 days before Abigail’s 1st birthday.

Can you believe our God?

Abigail’s condition was not genetic, and after today’s ultrasound, her little sibling appears to be absolutely and completely healthy, with Amy’s body doing everything exactly perfectly.

I know Billy and Amy are thrilled that God is blessing them with another baby. I even know that aside from some twinges of anxiety, they have an unexplainable peace about this baby’s health.

Yet, there’s one thing that’s a little tougher to work through. When Billy first found out Amy was pregnant, he immediately said, through tears, “I just don’t want Abigail to get gypped.”

For those of you with two children, you remember what it felt like right before your second one came. “How in the world am I going to love another child just as much? And how is it fair that I’m bringing another baby into this world and cheating my firstborn of some of my love?”

It’s magic though, isn’t it? You love them both. 100%.

Amy and Billy will too. It’s just that Abigail’s not here to physically receive her 100%. And some people don’t understand the depth of love a Mommy and Daddy can have for a child they spent such a short time with. They might think of this baby as taking Abigail’s place. No one can ever take the place of a child you’ve lost. Not even another child.

I’m having trouble thinking of words here to convey what’s in my heart. I guess what I want to say is this: will you pray with me for Amy and Billy? Will you pray for a healthy pregnancy for Amy (and strength–she teaches first grade) and for God to just lavish His amazing love and peace all over both of them? Will you pray for them as they navigate through the exciting emotions of expecting a baby while grieving another one? Each beautiful, happy moment is one they will feel blessed to experience–but without their Abigail.

And would you do me a favor and leave a comment for Amy and Billy letting them know you love them and will be praying? They mean the world to me, and I know your love and prayers will mean the world to them.

Congratulations, Miss Abigail, on your new little baby! We’re going to take such good care of him/her for you! Thank our Jesus for me, will you? I love you, girl!